I'm Deenie, a creative writer, essayist, and copywriter. 

Stupid Names, Great Results: Beauty Products Worth Trying

Stupid Names, Great Results: Beauty Products Worth Trying

I am not ashamed to admit that I will judge a book by its cover. Now, that's not to say that I won't still pick up the book, check out its contents, and maybe even purchase and read the book. But I still judged it. By its cover. And when I say "book," I really mean "cosmetics." Though sometimes I do judge books by their cover illustrations.

The other day as I was peering into my beauty cabinet, I had to laugh at the variety of ridiculous brand names, huddled together like outliers. Some names hard are to pronounce, others just tout outlandish claims.

Now I don't know what makes a great brand name for a beauty product (something believable? logical? French?), but I did want to tell you--the Internet--about some of my favorite beauty products with the stupidest names. Just in case you consider passing one up unwarranted.


miracle skin transformer

That name...is just absurd. I don't normally trust products that flat-out claim to work miracles. Jesus worked miracles. Surgeons work miracles. The trainers on The Biggest Loser work miracles. But as ridiculous as this name sounds, this brand is actually freaking awesome. I can't say enough about how much I love the FACE product with SPF 20. It does everything I need it to do: hydrate, smooth, give me as much or as little coverage as I want (I decide!), and it has SPF. Their concealer is great, too.


Why would you do that? "Cow" + "Shed" = definitely not something I want to slather all over my body. Or face. I discovered this brand while staying at SoHo House in East London. Problem about that was, after an afternoon at the spa and then using the products in the room, well...I was completely addicted. Offensive name and all. I'm hopelessly, undeniably, embarrassingly in love with these products. The smell, the texture, the variety, and most importantly, the way they make my skin and face feel and look. 


For some reason, whenever brands adopt a New York-centric name, they immediately lose their credibility to me. Sort of like going to a pizza joint in Kansas called "New York Famous Pie." Or take the mall-based store NY & Co.--that's some of the least New York-esque fashion I've ever seen. So, when I heard about Grand Central Beauty, I had to wonder, "What role has Manhattan's famous train station, Grand Central Station, played in the making of this beauty product?"

It's beyond me. But I do know that the Grand Central Beauty S.M.A.R.T. Skin Perfecting Serum + Primer (I knoooow the name is soooo lonnnng) works wonders. It's great for sensitive skin, hydrates, primes, and works as an anti-aging treatment. What I love most about it, though, is that the difference is immediately apparent. It's ideal on a long day when I need my foundation to last.

What can I say? I'm a loyalist.

*Bourbon & Gloss is part of the Amazon Associates affiliate program.

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